When “How Are You?” Is Too Big

What to say when someone you love is going through it, and what to skip. Seven pages.

When someone gets a diagnosis, a lot of people will go quiet, not knowing the right thing to say. Oftentimes, the silence just sits there, taking up the space comfort was supposed to fill.

I was on the receiving end of that for a year, with some people too uncomfortable to speak at all and some deep diving with me, leaving no rock unturned.

I wrote down what actually helped me to feel supported (and not like my situation was “too much”), so you can skip the awkward skirt-around and start with the kind of open, honest communication a moment like this actually deserves.

Where shall I send it?

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